Somehow, against all odds, Total War: Warhammer 2 has found more fantasy heroes and villains to stuff into its gargantuan roster. The next Legendary Lords DLC grudge match, The Warden & The Paunch, pits ill-tempered High Elf Eltharion The Grim against Grom, a warmongering greenskin who’s looking for a light snack. It’s out on May 21st, and you can catch it in action with a new trailer, posted today.
There’s something strange about a rabble of Goblins screaming “pointy-ears”, right? Like, c’mon lads, your ears are twice as pointy and thrice the size of your noggin, calm down.
Let’s start with those goblins, actually, because they’re ridiculous and I love ’em. The first of Warden and Paunch’s two new factions is Grom the Paunch’s Broken Axe. His army’s got a right hunger, with a campaign centred on collecting ingredients to cobble together new dishes.
These dishes grant buffs and access to new units like various trolls, rogue idols, and, most importantly, Snotling Pump Wagons – Snotlings being the smallest (and, dare I say, cutest) and most air-headed of all greenskins. Put ’em on a wagon, give ’em some knives, and you’ve got something proper nasty on your hands.
They’re also on a collision course with the DLC’s second faction, Eltharion the Grim’s Yvressian High Elves. As the foul-tempered warden, Eltharion’s all about nicking enemy heroes and interrogating them in his personal bastion, Athel Tamarha, with the overall goal of defending the city of Tor Yvresse. Downtown Yvressstarts in a right state, following Grom’s last scuffle – but the longer it’s left unharmed, the stronger a fortress it becomes.
To aid in this defence, Yvresse has its own ranks of new units to muster, from bands of man-sized lions pulling chariots to the mystical Arcane Phoenixes.
I actually have an old Eltharion model kicking about in the back room. The old metal one, mind, from before they made him the absolute unit straddling a Griffon that appears in Warden and Paunch. No, my one’s a right “studied the blade” dork with a cape and a blindfold. Maybe he isn’t overly ostentatious, but he’s definitely a nerd.
I’m not a nerd, though. I swear.
The Warden & The Paunch arrives on Steam on May 21st, with a 10% price cut currently putting it at £6.29.